Nurture — Day 3: Supplemental
Earlier today, after posting my Day 3 blog, I had a zoom meeting with the artists’ collective that I’ve joined. The purpose of it was to give participants actionable tools towards becoming profitable in art creation. That’s not the important part (for me), as absolutely useful as it was. Something rather astounding happened to my mindset during the presentation…
I raised a concern that I had as a PWD regarding the standard ways in which we are perceived by Average Bear. There’s a well-supported belief in the online PWD community that we are generally seen in three ways:
A source of INSPIRATION ™ : “Look at what they can do. Amazing in their condition…”
A CAUTIONARY TALE ™ : “If you don’t [fill in lifestyle prohibition], you could end up just like them…”
An object of CHARITY ™ : “I’m a caring person; see how much I’ve given to…”
Whether we match those expectations or not, other persons—abled or even other PWD—tend to engage with PWD in ways which lessen their own feelings of discomfort. This often (generally, in fact) leads to being treated with kid-gloves, having PWD voices and needs determined by those that “know better”, and discounting how we can, and do, contribute to society at large. These attitudes also tend to negate the reality that disability has no respect for age, sex, gender, nationality, religion, culture, etc. It can happen to anyone at any time. I can certainly understand the fear that drives these attitudes—even at a subconscious level.
In my advocacy efforts, I’ve always struggled to find a way to break through these (pre)conceptions / attitudes. It’s extremely difficult to connect with other persons over PWD issues, to find common ground, when there are these enormous obstacles in the path. Years of advocacy, and I was still clueless as to how to work through this constant struggle.
Then it hit me—while our host was on to her next point…
I need to find a way to transform the negative emotions embedded in those three attitudes into positive actionable emotions.
I’m now on a mission to transform:
Inspiration → a feeling of SHARED EXPERIENCE
Cautionary Tale → EMPATHY or SYMPATHY for something that could happen to anyone
Charity Object → a sense of SHARING in a goal, venture, or achievement
So…moving forward, I hope to convey a change of my own attitudes in how I write in blog posts, announcements, item descriptions, etc.
I’m more than happy to accept suggestions on what you, Gentle Reader, would like to see more of here. I can’t promise to open myself up completely to you, but I can promise to be as transparent as is safe on the interwebs 😉
Be well,
Gryph
